


Be Free

by Avira



Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-02-28 10:16:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13269357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avira/pseuds/Avira
Summary: You were never supposed to have this happen to you you deserved different.





	1. Chapter 1

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. You were never supposed to be in this situation. This place. The place that things end. Out of everyone and all the things you’ve been through. You were supposed to live a long and fulfilling life. Finish school finally pursue your true passion of art. Standing up to your piss poor old man and scream about him pushing his will onto you to be better when all you wanted was to paint and draw. I remember how you once used to draw all the shinigami, your family and even some of the hollow cause it reminded of what once made you happy and brought you the happiest moments of your life. You don’t remember them now my beautiful king but I do. I saved every last bit of your drawings hoping it would prolong the inevitable but you kept forgetting them slowly one by one. Not that it was a huge loss because they lost you many months ago. When they couldn’t even bother to check in unless they needed you.

You were always so strong, you were the shoulder that everyone leaned on. Until they moved on and you were left in the dust just like some old relic from centuries past to just rote away like the rest of there great heroes from long ago. Even though they owe you everything. Them just being able to breathe and continue on in there mundane lives its all thanks to you and the things you accomplished. God you were always so beautiful with your beautiful ginger hair that you let grow out just because you knew I loved to run my hands through its softness. Your Carmel mocha eyes that I could see our entire future reflected in them together side by side just like we always were. Even when you lost your powers you knew I was there just like howI knew how you never gave up on seein me again either.

You were my entire world my strawberry. Yet all I see now is a shell of what you formally were. Alone in this empty hospital. Not a single living soul to bother you or worry about your well being. The idiots that you haven’t seen in over 3 years. The people that you once considered your friends and family absent in your bleak hospital room that has a chill that filters its way in your bones and just settles there till your numb. 

There the ones that called me the monster and yet I’m the only one to watch over you through these long months. Why did it progress this far. Why did it have to choose you out of every single soul out there when your the one that deserves to live the most. I hate it. I hate it i hate it i hate it!!!

Now the only thing that shows me your alive is the faint sound that comes from the heart monitor the only thing that tells me your still in there and still fightin to return to my side...... but I don’t want you to return to the pain that you were in. It became a constant for you and while we still had plenty of good days to outweigh the bad. Your beautiful sunshine smiles had an undertone of pain to everyone. No I don’t want you to fight in a world where you unhappy cause your happiness is my happiness. Your pain is my pain. Just like it has been ever sense we were connected on that faithful day in that deep hole. This isn’t my speech to have you continue this is my speech for you to let go....

It’s okay my glorious king you’ve have fought hard enough in this world its time to continue on to the next. I promise you this new place will admire you and will be your new family unlike the one you have now. You will never be forgotten again and you will get the recognition you deserve for all the deeds you’ve done.. Even if you don’t remember I and a few other will in your place. I love you my strawberry king and I will be with you through your new journey by your side just as i always been.

Let go my gorgeous king.

In that empty hospital room with out a single livin soul Ichigo Kurosaki died with a smile on his face. With the only one knowing why being the being that everyone else called a monster.


	2. Chapter 2

“Ichigo.”

_What was that?_

“Ichigo.”

_Who is it, why are you calling that name... Wait I know that name it’s my name. Why are you calling it though its all staticky I cant here properly what’s going on?!?_

“Ichigo!!!!”

_Finally a picture came to my eyes but its all blurry its like when you get murky water in your eyes. You cant see anything to clear but it gives you color and shapes. This feels like a dream. I see two figures one with orange hair and one with black. I’m Just monitoring as a spectator on the side of this show._   

“Are you even listening to me! Look at me when I talk to you!! Goddammit Ichigo why cant you just be normal like everyone else why.cant you accept the fact that your a normal human now and there’s nothing you can do about it!!!”

_I don’t wanna be here. It’s cold._

“ But old man i just cant! Everyone of my age group are so normal it hurts. We have nothing in common. All they care about is school and how there they’re gonna pass there next mock exam. It’s such trivial things after everything Ive been through!”

_Im not talking yet I hear my voice is that me?_

“You have to let it go Ichigo! You are human! No more soul society, no more fighting hollows, and no more soul reapers.”

“But dad..”

_Let me leave I don’t wanna hear this anymore. Something bad is gonna happen. It hurts! Why does it hurt?!?!_

“No buts your suppose friends aren’t coming back you have served your purpose to them. You’ve been used up and tossed out like a old dish rag with to many holes and no use! Stop being so inconsiderate and look around!! You say your an adult well act like it! Stop hoping for stuff that’s never gonna happen just stop. Grow up. I’m sick of this discussion. There will be no more of it you understand?”

_No I don’t why am I watching this, seeing this is it real or not? Why am I watching myself if it is me?!?!_

I just stood there in silent shock here was one of the people that I thought would stay by my side despite us not being that close but he shut me down just like everyone else just wanting me to go back to being a regular teenager. How do I even do that? Everyone wants me to but no one explained how. How do you pretend nothing happened with everything I saw. I fought in a war and became victor. I died two times and cam close so many more. I see it every time I close my eyes all the tears, the blood..

_I can hear his thoughts or is it my thoughts_.....

“ICHIGO KUROSAKI DO YOU UNDERSTAND!!!”

“Yes sir..”

The day I lost one more person close to my heart.

  
~~~~~~~~~~~

  
I awoke with a start and a light sheen of sweat covering my skin.

When I first opened my eyes all I saw was a vaste sea of white sand. No sound no movement but the swift wind that shifted the sand. Anxiety is such a crippling thing. The hopelessness that comes with it is not much better though either. It’s suffocating there’s nothing as far as i can see. It’s nauseating not knowing what’s ahead or something far behind you on this long stretch of dessert.

Ichigo let out a humorless laugh at the irony of the situation. Surrounded by this unending dessert. I already feel so empty I guess it’s fitting I would wake up here. The dunes made the most interesting shapes, and the shift of the sands created gliding dancers against the vast planes. It was the most beautiful thing that Ive ever seen. There were a few dead trees scattered randomnly but it felt so connected. I felt so rejuvenated just looking over this scene.

That’s not really saying much since I don’t remember anything but my name. Except for that random flashback.. or was it? I cant even tell. But if it was a memory I almost felt glad about not rembering anything either. It wasn’t like I forgot everything, I don’t think. With that snippet I know I had some kind of past. I just don’t remember the people or places its blurry. I do remember the emotions and feelings. I remember that I was fighting a losing battle. The betrayal and hurt that i felt from people that i feel were once close to me. The most important one is the feeling of being not completely whole like I said earlier I missing someone who was close to me and stood by my side through it all. There was a piece missing. My light and the only thing I held on to in the end of whatever happened before this. I could feel them it was like a string was wrapped softly around me with the only purpose being to guide me back to the one that was my everything.

I had to return to him as soon as possible. I’m not sure how but sitting here and waiting isn’t gonna help me either. First I have to be able to stand. Which brought me to my next relations when I look myself over I feel as if i look different I’m not sure how but just different. Starting slow is always the best in these situations. So with that in mind I move to stand. Almost collapsing back to the ground after my knees started to wobble from disuse I think. Have no idea how long Ive been here so not surprising. In the end steadied for me though at least. The sand felt so refreshing on my toes. So soothing I just couldn’t take it anymore I took off in a sprint through that beautiful sand that surrounded me with the wind at my back pushin me along it was exhilarating.

“Come back to me my king”

It was so soft I thought I imagined it I couldn’t hear it properly. The wind almost seemed to know what I wanted and carried the sound back to me. The relief I felt when i heard it was almost unnerving but it had another meaning to me. It meant that there was someone out there waitin for me somewhere in this vaste world that I am now apart of and perhaps this one wont be so bad in fact I was sure of it. So I continued on my quest with my head held high.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actually got some inspiration to continue this hope you like it!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for it being short. Ill have more as soon as I can! Thanks for the hits everyone!!

I haven’t felt this let done in years. There’s just something about that dull throbbing pain that is so unbearable and excruciating. The first time I felt it was when I lost my powers and how everyone was still going to try and stay in touch. I accepted it wouldn’t be very often cause of how busy there lives are and the whole living in another realm but I had faith that they would keep there word and not leave me completely. It didn’t happen quite how I wanted to they didn’t show up for quite a long time. And I was majorly depressed. Marked down the days from when they were supposed to be here but that day came and went with still no word. And yet I still waited. Not sure if I should give up or hang on for a bit more the days felt so long. The nights weren’t much better It became a horse to do anything and time was against me had to start avoiding the clocks around the house because I was so obsessed with it.

Then out of the blue they just showed up conveniently when I was gonna give up on them and my old man was away on a trip. It was like old times. We had a lot of fun for a change. We talked the night away about how everyone back in soul society was still struggling to gain some semblance of control but it was looking better then before. Those injured were also doing better. Just like any war there were still casualties but they were trying to make sure the numbers stayed low. While everyone was laughing and joking there felt like there was a drift that was starting to form as well.

Like when they tried to make small talk about how I was doing even though I lied that it was good. They just didn’t really know what to ask to the hero of war war that lost all power in order to win. Poor things it was almost funny in a weird way how stiff they were. I probably didn’t help especially when I mentioned how my asshole of an old man told me how I was gonna rot before they would see me again. And they didn’t try to deny it almost like it was a half truth but not wanting to be said out loud. Poor Renji he tried to lighten the mood with jokes and how everyone wanted to know about the substitute who became there savior, how he fought off Aizen, how he became so strong so fast, just how I accomplished it i general. Then it happened again. An awkward pause when Renji told me how I had to come see the new renovations and everyone else only to stop abruptly when he realized what he said. The room felt super heavy as if a weight layed on there shoulders with the realization I wasn’t a soul reaper anymore. That I was just a human with no abilities or powers to speak of.... well as far as they knew anyway. Don’t think they would appreciate knowing that I still have my hollow and how he can now manifest into our world. Or just be a spirit that not even they can see. Sometimes he’s even just a voice in my head.

“Ah come on king it could be fun to see wha faces the bastards might make.”

Better to leave that quiet for now

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all liked it I think i might continue it but I’m not sure yet. If you liked it let me know and I’ll try~~


End file.
